Experts Reveal that Budapest Earthquake Would Have Pro-Communist Bias

Following the devastating earthquake in Haiti, some people began to question how Budapest would fare if like Haiti it was struck by a magnitude 7 shaker, with the answer being quite terribly. Origo.hu asked researchers at the Hungarian Academy of Sciences who said given the lack of such earthquakes in the region, they could only make educated guesses, but said it would be worse, as there's actually infrastructure to destroy here (their words, not ours). The experts added, however, that the old buildings in central Budapest with many shops in the bottom would suffer catastrophic damage, especially those where small shops were combined into a larger one, thereby removing supporting walls. While the parliament's dome would survive, most church towers would break apart, as would water and gas mains. In fact, the only things expected to survive a strong quake more or less intact would be the ugly panel houses built during the Kádár period.

Given how the houses of God would crumble yet the houses of Marx would survive, we can't help but think that the Earth might be a communist sympathizer after all. Those of you worried now can rest easy, however, as earthquakes with a magnitude of 5.5 or higher only hit Hungary every fifty years, meaning we won't be due for another one in oh crap…