Hungarians Observe Historic Berlin Wall Anniversary with… OMG, Kata Sarka is Like, So Sad About Having to Show Her Crotch to CKM!

So today's the BIG DAY! Twenty years ago, the Berlin Wall came tumbling down, instantly freeing millions of individuals hitherto enslaved by communist dictatorship. So what's the feeling here in Hungary? Well, as the world media is now awkwardly discovering, one common response is on second thought, we actually liked that steel-toed boot on our necks.

Depressing, no? AND YOU DON'T KNOW THE HALF OF IT! Because in reality, most Hungarians don't even give enough of a shit to be against the spread of political and economic freedom. So what do they really care about? Celebrities, that's what! So to commemorate this momentous day in world history, we're going to ignore it completely and instead publish a shitload of meaningless celeb-related items of the sort that keep Hungarians from bothering to take up the rights and responsibilities demanded by life in a free society. Note that some are a bit out of date, but since none is in the slightest bit important, who the fuck cares. In fact, who the fuck cares about anything anymore?

• Hungarian media regulator ORTT last month received numerous furious complaints from people who had tuned in to a recent episode of TV2's celebrity dinner show "Hal a Tortán" featuring stars with criminal records. Among the criminal celebs appearing were singer/tax cheat Sarolta Zalatnay, fraudster tycoon József Stadler, former beauty queen/embezzler Éva Nagy and mafia kingpin Péter Tasnádi. No word if anyone complained about the show being unrealistic, given that Roma singer Joci Pápai was the only guest who hadn't been to jail, having only been indicted on a drug charge. Just kidding (sort of). [velvet.hu]
• Writers of hospital soap "Jóban Rosszban" are reconsidering their decision to write the character played by Tibor Gazdag out of the story after receiving a similarly angry onslaught of letters from rabid fans. [blikk.hu]
• Out-of-control asshole actor Roland Damu's theater school has been closed, because he was unable to stop yelling at his students and their parents, and otherwise being an out-of-control asshole. The 35-year-old Damu was earlier in the news for allegedly injuring a cast member on the set of "Jóban Rosszban." According to one former student, "We didn't know why but he was yelling all the time." Asshole! [blikk.hu]
• Crazy-haired sissy-ass organist Xavér Varnus recently suffered a blazing humiliation when his organ caught on fire during a concert. Varnus tried like the dickens to fix the infernal machine, but he couldn't, so he had to finish the concert on another organ in a different room. By the end of the performance, only 100 spectators remained of the original 1,200. Ouch. [index.hu]
• Insufferable and eternally suffering pseudo-celeb wife Kata Sarka ran away crying from a photoshoot for ladmag CKM she had agreed to (or more likely her vile husband/pimp Péter Hajdú had agreed to) because they wanted a shot of her crotch. [borsonline.hu]
• Nóra Ördög, hostess of RTL Klub's talent show "Csillag születik", couldn't hold her tears back when contestant István Tabáni sang "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen, apparently because she was overcome by the raw emotion expressed in the performance and not because someone was trying to snap a picture of her snapper. [blikk.hu]
• "Jóban Rosszban" star Viki H. Szorcsik is not only suffering from an eating disorder, she also recently needed "serious foot surgery." We assume it's not because she ate it. [borsonline.hu]
• Model Regina Dukai recently had surgery to have a "small cyst" removed from her neck, a big change from her normal surgical routine of having large things implanted just below her neck. [blikk.hu]
• Hungarian fitness queen Réka Rubint is said to be heavy with Hungarian fitness king Fitness Norbi's third child. Though not too heavy; Rubint is alleged to have had her previous two whelps cut out at eight months, like cysts, to keep her from getting stretch marks as they clawed their way out of her noxious, Norbi-polluted cooter. [blikk.hu]

• Idiot TV host Balázs Sebestyén named his son Benett. Everyone toast him with a nice frothy glass of his own urine. [blikk.hu]
• Pákó Fekete's wife is expecting their second baby in March. He says he has become much more serious as of late, and that his son Bence and wife Ágica mean everything to him, and even when he is not with them, he is "working for them." Also: He's black, and his babies are half-black. In Hungary! [borsonline.hu]
• Speaking of Hungarians mating with black people, Michael Jackson's 80-year-old father allegedly put the move on (very non-black) Magyar model Edina Pantinchin in Los Vegas. The playmate made the grave accusation of attempted race mongrelization on one of those "social networking sites," supporting her claim with a photograph. Pantichin said they met at a Benihana restaurant and "it was love at first sight," though not on her part. Snap! [borsonline.hu]
• Speaking of old goats trying to make the move on dewy young things, 62-year-old guitarist Dániel Benkő is fighting to remove the "not for viewers under 16 year of age" warning from his new reality show, in which he makes women compete for the honor of being his wife. He thinks that by letting younger viewers watch he can help society by "educating youngsters about sex in an entertaining way." Meanwhile, the results of an online poll to discover the "most shocking" kiss scene featured on Benkő's show suggested to the poll's organizer (velvet.hu) that RTL Klub is using the show as "a magic weapon for birth control against people with a healthy sex life." [borsonline.hu, velvet.hu]
• Also speaking of old goats trying to make the move on dewy young things, Hungarian-born Italian porn star/politician Cicciolina (58) and her fiancé, laywer Luca di Carló - who is 25 years old younger than her - will get married on Valentine's Day 2010 in Rome. The wedding will not take place at a church, because apparently the Pope had a cow. But Cicciolina doesn't want to hold her third wedding in Budapest, because the first two were held here, and both were epic fails. [blikk.hu]
• TV2's newest quiz show, "Párbaj," is being described as a epic fail even though the channel managed to get the country's most popular quiz show host, cunning stuck-up MSZP-ass-licking commie bastard István Vágó, to leave RTL Klub and host the show. [blikk.hu]
• For what must be the tenth year running - we had this same stupid story back in December of '05 - famously irritating TV presenter Tünde Kiszel is planning on putting out a calendar, featuring herself and family members in various states of dress and undress. [borsonline.hu]
• Roma singer/showman Győzike says he is ready to pay the more than Ft 20 million he owes national tax office APEH, because his new coffin business is going well. In recent months his family finances have taken such a turn for the worse that his wife, Bea, has had to work at a local grocery.[blikk.hu]
• Indian-Hungarian media personality Joshi Bharat has published a book about his life in which he reveals how he once dealt with a bunch of menacing Hungarian skinheads he encountered on a train. He used a racist joke about black people, telling his "new friends" the following joke: "Why was white chocolate invented? So that black kids can make themselves messy." [borsonline.hu]