In the News: Government Cancels April Fool's Day!

• Playmate Anna Kelemen "admitted" that she is not as stupid as she acts. "I don't think I'm dumb (butuska)," said the woman many people believe is Hungary's answer to Paris Hilton, except without the rich parents. "I play a part like every exhibitionist. I don't care if, because I express myself in a funny way, someone thinks that it is being stupid. I think feminist careerist women who can't get a guy are stupid. This is going on throughout the whole world, and men are afraid to approach these women." For some reason we're going to make this the lead story of the only item we are going to file today, and not just because of that pic. [híradó]

• Seven people were rescued from the tenth floor of a burning building on Pannónia utca (Dist. XIII) this morning. The fire was probably caused by a burning cigarette thrown into a trash collector in the corridor, proving again the hazards of not letting people smoke in their offices. [híradó]

• According to right-wing daily Magyar Nemzet, April Fools' Day (bolondok napja) will be canceled this year for "political reasons." The governing Socialist Party (MSZP) asked MTV to avoid using the phrase bolondok napja on television on April 1st, because the party will hold its main rally on Andrássy út on that day. Hahahahaahahahaha. Ooooh, life is sweet. [magyar nemzet]

• A 28-year-old man admitted to beating his 75-year-old grandmother to death with a rolling pin over Ft 30,000 in Győrszentiván (Győr-Moson-Sopron County) last summer. After the murder, he went out with his friends and spent all of the money. Just in case you were feeling guilty about not writing to your grandma, now you don't have to. Well, unless you also killed her for beer money. [nethírlap]

• Antal Rogán, campaign chief of opposition party Fidesz announced that if they win the elections, the limousine that Prime Minister Ferenc Gyurcsány used in a television advertisement will be sold, and the money given to blind and vision-impaired people. As if we were, you know, blind. [inforadio.hu]

• Revenues of national gaming monopoly Szerencsejáték Zrt grew by Ft 21 billion in 2005, to Ft 131.8 billion, which is a record. Ch-ching! [napi online]

• The first trains on the Metro 3 line were 20 minutes late this morning due to the presence of some graffiti "artists" in the tunnel, which prevented the engineers from turning on the high-voltage needed to drive the trains. Budapest transport company BKV and the police couldn't find the perpetrators, having decided against just dialing up the juice and following the smell. [híradó]

• One Tamás Déri (20) won the semi-finals of the "Red Bull International Paper Plane Competition" held in Veszprém. His plane flew 26 meters; the world record is 58.82 meters. Déri says a good paper plane is made of an A4 sheet, and should not be torn, glued, cut, stapled or have weights hanged on it. The secret of a long flight is in a heavy nose, small wings, and throwing the fucker "like a javelin." [blikk]

• A movie is being made about Roma singer and "Megasztár 1" finalist Ibolya Oláh's life, in which she will probably play herself. [blikk]

• The Equal Treatment Authority says that Constantinum Catholic High School violated the requirement of equal treatment when students who stayed away from a protest for equal treatment of students of church schools were punished with a test. Got that? [hírszerző]

• The Competition Office (GVH) fined teleco TELE2 Ft 50 million for misleading consumers. In several of its advertisements, the company offered phoning "for free, without subscription fee," which it does not provide. [napi online]

• Famed transvestite father Terry Black recently spent three days behind bars. At first, he didn't understood why he was taken in, then it turned out that a judge had ordered his arrest for "offending his honor" at an earlier trial. Black hadn't attended that trial because he was in the hospital at the time. He sent the proof to the authorities, but it was late, so he was locked up. He met a taxisgyilkos (taxi cab killer) while in the joint, who was released before he was. [uno.hu]