When the Last Hungarian Leaves Work, Turn Out the Lights

I actually felt a little bad after I filed last week's column, which was a spoof of Prime Minister Ferenc Gyurcsány's then-still-secret "100 Steps" reform platform. After all, it's not very nice to make fun of someone's work before they even get a chance to unveil it. But after hearing what the PM has in mind for Hungary, I felt even worse, because some of the steps he would have the country walk will probably lead it straight to economic and social ruin. As I suspected, the "100 Steps" actually number much fewer than 100, and thank heavens for that. Even if there were only 25 as bad as the one's I've checked out, I'd probably be too depressed to complain about them.

Overall, the PM's master plan is about employment, as in how to create more and better paying jobs for Hungarians that are on the books and otherwise official. All of which sounds decent, because one of Hungary's biggest problems is its exceptionally low official workforce participation rate. This, you should note, is not the same thing as unemployment, which is actually pretty low in most of Hungary outside some bleak bits out east. Instead, it means the number of people who actually show up on the books as working, or who are actually engaged in any sort of gainful employment. Right now, that number is something like 4 million, meaning that around 40% of Hungarians - and a good chunk of working-age ones - are not working or looking for work. It also more or less means that these 4 million working Hungarians are supporting the other 6 million who don't work. Which, like I said, is a pretty big problem, especially given that almost a million of those on the job are working for the state.

To be fair, the early refrains of Gyurcsány's song sounded pretty good. As his "first step," the PM said he was asking his government to "demolish the obstacles" standing in the way of more effective employment policies, especially those obstacles that the state itself had created. Then he said that the country's unemployment programs should be recast as "job search support" programs, for which more funds would be needed. He also argued that the "unreasonably regulated" market for seasonal agricultural labor needed to be streamlined.

According to this document, our best plan for finishing the project is just getting blind drunk and forgetting about it

As good as some or all of this sounds, however, it can't make up for what seems to be an apocalyptically bone-headed plan to extend the country's appalling web of employment red tape to those people not already ensnared in it. Stunningly, Gyurcsány said that among his priorities is turning the "black work" currently done in households "blue," specifically mentioning the hauling of wood and raising of kids. Now, I have no doubt that hauling wood or raising kids is hard work - and a hell of a lot harder than the work I do - but why anyone would want to turn it into a "normal" job subject to all the insane government rules and regulations I have no idea.

While Gyurcsány claims he wants to turn this and other unregulated "black" work "blue" or "white" to give pensions and dignity to those doing the work, I reckon this is at best a tertiary concern. Instead, what he really wants to do is increase the government's take from all this "unauthorized" productive behavior, which by some estimates totals as much as Ft 3 trillion (€12 billion).

In addition to increasing the regulation of housework, the government will be targeting the construction industry, which, as in all countries, is mostly run on informal or semi-informal labor. The permit procedure for constructions costing more than Ft 30 million would become stricter, forcing, for example, developers and builders to say how much the project is expected to cost, and who will work on the project. Working hours on such sites would also be more closely monitored.

Another, even more mind-blowing proposal involves sweeping regulation of gratuities for restaurant staff. "The government proposes a law to require tips between 0% and 15% to be written on the bill," Gyurcsány said, adding that the exact amount could be decided by the restaurant in question, and then posted on the menu.

While regulations like this might bring in a few extra forints into government coffers, I doubt the number will be anything close to what Gyurcsány and his people hope or expect. Hungarians have always found out a way to get around idiotic and onerous rules and taxes, and I don't see any reason why this situation should change. Indeed, one recent crackdown by the tax authorities against "black" work in the construction industry netted only five "culprits" among 1,400 targets. Frankly, Gyurcsány and his crowd are jackasses for even thinking about making increased regulation of the labor market the centerpiece of their re-election effort.

Labor Minister Csizmár: I know! We could also set up a plan were instead of getting paid in cash, hard-working employees get nifty little lapel pins!

No, that's actually unfair. They are worse than jackasses, because my guess is that they don't believe most of the BS they are saying. Instead, they are dumping this reeking load of policy manure out in the town square because they think some people are dumb enough to believe it smells good, or corrupt enough to be willing to pretend it does, in order to enhance their own power and perks, and to avoid taking the painful but necessary steps required for getting the country on the right track. (Such as undertaking a major cull of state workers, slashing the budget, reforming the health care system and otherwise dragging the government into the late 20th century.) It's no coincidence that on Friday Minister of Labor and Employment Gábor Csizmár met with the country's trade unions and found near-ecstatic support for the plan. If these old dinosaurs are with the program, that's all I need to hear to know that I am against it.

In the final insult, Gyurcsány said that all this mischief was being done in the name of "honestly done and paid work." This from a man who made his millions through paper-shuffling and political influence, and who is now doing his best to hang on to power by picking the pockets of those who actually do work hard and create economic value for their country and fellow citizens. And I thought I was a cheeky son of a bitch.

Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be much that can be done to stop this train wreck from happening, unless the liberals in the coalition get off their behinds and threaten a mutiny. Then again, we can all do our own little part. If the anti-gratuity regulation comes into effect, I for one am going to slip a Ft 2,000 bill into the inside jacket pocket of the first waiter I come in contact with - provided, of course, that he or she actually works for it.